Hell to the Nah: The Real Housewives of Vanderpump Rules

In many ways, Bravo is a douche-y, frat-y, date rape-y network where ‘no’ means ‘ok, sure’ and shows just slam together like particles in the Large Hadron Collider. I was giddy with excitement over the two-hour (!!!!) extended Real Housewives of Beverly Hills dinner party conclusion and the impending Eddie Cibrian (sp?) mistress confrontation. I quietly locked myself in my room as to remain uninterrupted and sunk into my bed, ready for the most exciting night of my life to begin.

I am so ready.

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Panty Dropper: Yolanda Bananas Foster from RHOBH

There are a grand total of six people in America who aren’t sad as fuck today about losing the $550 million Powerball. 1) and 2) the winners, 3) Jay-Z, 4) Beyoncé, and 5) Oprah.

O

I am so fucking rich!

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Role Call: The Best Moments from RHOBH

When you’re a little kid, staying home from school was truly awesome. You were waited on hand and foot, you got a cold or warm compress professionally applied by your mom, you had access to unlimited popsicles, chicken broth, Goldfish crackers, and you had nonstop Saltines on deck. Judge Judy on the reg. Montel reruns for hours. That’s the life, son. Read the rest of this story »

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