I’ve had to spend a few days collecting my thoughts about the Masterpiece Theatre train wreck that was “Liz & Dick”. Was it a sad performance from a frozen faced ginger bitch in a series of bad wigs or was it an art performance redolent of Allan Kaprow? Was it a pathetic attempt at telling a beautiful love story or a fantastic piece of high camp? Did I love it? Did I hate it? Did I throw up in the middle of my second showing of the movie because I had to get incredibly drunk to sit through it?
Yes, yes, and yes! I don’t care what the highbrow critics have to say about “Liz & Dick”. I thought it was an incredible and perfect film that showcased the talents of a true visionary.
So what if the made-for-T.V. movie was a soapy fucking mess. I’m not 100% positive that there was a script or a storyboard even though the movie was based on actual events. For example, in the beginning of the film Lindsay is pouting in her dressing room before shooting a love scene for “Cleopatra”. She finds out that she has to film a love scene with Richard Burton (played by the ridiculous Grant Bowler) and she is HORRIFIED. Which is really fucking weird because a) shouldn’t she have read the script for the movie and b) she is playing a historical figure whom had one of the most famous documented love affairs in the history of planet Earth…shouldn’t she know there will be a love scene?
Obviously Lindsay Lohan has lost her fucking mind. She is clearly choosing film roles based on whether or not she can smoke freely in every scene and I am LOVING IT. I also loved how this fuck show of a movie wandered aimlessly through a lazy river of equally lazy dialogue.