Fuck, Marry, or Kill: One Direction

As a functional adult human over the age of 16, I have little knowledge of the super group sensation One Direction. I don’t listen to the radio and for legal reasons I try my best to avoid spending time with teenage girls and as such I avoided what Huffington Post described as “the year of One Direction.” I’ve really tried to avoid pop saturation this year. I’ve never heard “Call Me, Maybe” all the way through and I cannot name more than one Rihanna song with the word ‘diamond’ in the title. Oh, actually I was just told that every Rihanna song now how the word ‘diamond’ somewhere in the title. My point is, I’ve tried really hard to stay uninformed, to remain untainted by the mythical wonders that are One Direction. So what happened when my co-worker told me there was a video that I just had to watch? My life took on a new direction…One Direction.

One Direction

Omigod they are so zany!

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Fuck, Marry, or Kill: Seven Psychopaths Edition

First of all, I’m never going to actually watch this movie. This isn’t a movie review. This is our first edition of Fuck, Marry, or Kill—a game where we judge celebrities based on their looks and decide whether we would fuck them senseless, marry them for their money, or murder them.

Based solely off the promotional material for Seven Psychopaths I believe this movie looks terrible. I don’t know what the plot is about but the poster reminds me of Reservoir Dogs or The Usual Suspects, which are two movies I constantly lie about having watched. On to the poster…in order of appearance:

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