Goodbye 2012

It’s that time of year again. Time to determine my New Year’s Resolutions.  Considering the last two weeks of my life have been a Bacchanalian cheese filled gorge fest replete with peppermint flavored anything and everything, I think I’m going to try to be….ugh…healthy.

Man Eating

Can I get a small Diet Coke with that?

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Panty Dropper: Yolanda Bananas Foster from RHOBH

There are a grand total of six people in America who aren’t sad as fuck today about losing the $550 million Powerball. 1) and 2) the winners, 3) Jay-Z, 4) Beyoncé, and 5) Oprah.

O

I am so fucking rich!

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Well That Was Fucking Horrible.

Ah, the holidays! A time for eating, laughter, fun, togetherness, tears, insults, and binge drinking as a hysterical displacement activity.

 

Taylor

Pictured: everyone in America for the last 5 days.

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Role Call: The Best Moments from RHOBH

When you’re a little kid, staying home from school was truly awesome. You were waited on hand and foot, you got a cold or warm compress professionally applied by your mom, you had access to unlimited popsicles, chicken broth, Goldfish crackers, and you had nonstop Saltines on deck. Judge Judy on the reg. Montel reruns for hours. That’s the life, son. Read the rest of this story »

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Sorry Not Sorry

Please excuse my lapse in posting yesterday. I felt a lot Kim…

Same.Just because I’m deathly ill doesn’t mean I don’t want to eat Taco Bell nachos for lunch.

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